Love Life, Hate Kittens

Best steak in los angeles. I swear.

I have never turned down steak in my life. Good steak, bad steak, Hong Kong cafe steaks, steak from Sizzler’s, steak from Denny’s, I’m all in.

Strangely enough, I have never had steak at a major steakhouse (i.e Cut, Ruth Chris’, etc.) and I don’t think STK counts considering I only went for drinks, cute boys and marathon flirting. Problem with steakhouses is that it’s so damn pricey! Upwards to $150 a steak, holy jesus! The only thing I like more than steak is more steaks. Do you know how many Bossa Nova steaks I can buy with 150 bucks? (answer: a million.)

After an uneventful encounter with an all packed Tar Pit, my dining companion and I headed to Carlitos. Unassuming Carlitos.

Carlitos Gardel is a romantic, quaint little place. This is a place where you tell your lover to meet, a place where anniversaries are created. This is a place for old lifelong friends, a place your grandfather wants to pass on to you. This is a place you grow old with.

We started with mussels and garlic fries. Delicious. Garlicky and fresh. Tried not to soak up too much of the sauce with bread. Must save room for steak. For our mains, I got the special 18oz NY with peppercorn/mushroom sauce and he got the 14 oz ribeye with chimichurri. STOP THE FUCKING PRESSES. The ribeye was the most decadent steak I’ve ever had. Almost rare, juicy, soft while retaining the meatiness of a steak. Unlike Wagyu which is way too fatty/buttery for me. This was perfect. My NY was great, but the ribeye was zomgamazing. Why so delicious, steak?

I honestly cannot eat another piece of steak without comparing. I want to go back tonight, tomorrow night, the night after. I want to go back weekly. I will be one of those old ladies that never changes her order EVAR. Ribeye, you are my best friend.

By the time we hit dessert (the peach cake), I was stuffed and content.

So this is what bliss feels like.

What are you waiting for? Go try it now before I chase you down like Sam-I-Am.

Carlitos Gardel
7963 Melrose Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90046
(323) 655-0891
www.carlitosgardel.com

Tar Pit = Viceroy of Mid-City.

[Duck Sliders - tastes better than it looks. Pic from Sook W.]

Newest creation from Mark Peel of Campanile fame.

Shiny. Pretty. Frivolous. I love the decor. I love pretty chairs. A bit gothic, a bit Victorian or in order words, a bit Anna Sui.

Note: Do not come here without a reservation on the weekends. Thought we’d come here on a whim last Saturday (Friday?) and it was an hour wait at 10PM.

Note #2: Their kitchen closes at 12AM for you classy nightbirds.

The booths are really cozy. While I would never come here for a full meal (the food isn’t that good), the ambiance and mood makes it the perfect place for afterwork drinks, happy hour with friends, or an adulterous affair. Though if you’re having an affair, going to a high profile restaurant probably isn’t your best bet.

The food is split between bar bites and dinner. I’d give the food 2 stars overall. There were some (one) highlights and the rest were pretty average. In fact, it reminded me of hotel food or museum restaurants. Fancy but no dice.

Food:

Duck sliders - tasty. if you’re familiar with chinese pulled pork, this is what it tastes like but with duck. The bun was slightly toasted and gave a nice crunch.

Clams Casino - Fail. Overcooked clams with a small slice of bacon. Something you’d bring to a ‘my first potluck’ party.

Oysters - n/a. It’s oysters. The only thing I can comment is that they weren’t too plump.

Lobster and Scallop Newberg - Easily the best dish of the night! Healthy chunks of lobster, light sauce, perfect for bread dipping. Loved the mushrooms and carrots.

Fries - The fries were OK but the dipping sauce is what sets it over the top. Tasted like truffled mayo. Mmmmm. mayo.

Tuna Tartare - Served with cucumber. They should consider taro chips. Flavors were OK. Nothing exciting. A bit bland.

Mussels - These were OK. It’s not Tasca, it’s not Nook, it’s not even Father’s Office.

If you’re into places like Copa D’Oro and the Varnish, they boast a really nice drink menu. We tried a couple such as the Dark + Stormy, Gin Gin Mule, and Agave Bravo. All were good but I’m not a big cocktail girl so while tasty, I don’t really get wet over it.

Last note: All bottles of wine are $38 which is a good/bad thing depending on how much you know wine.

I’d come back. Only cuz I’m pretty plastic myself.

The Tar Pit

609 N La Brea Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90036
www.tarpitbar.com

Father’s Office minus the burger. Blasphemy I know.

[via Sherry R]

Oh my, it’s been a year. A year ago I came to this Father’s Office and had the burger. Fantastic burger. During this fine time, they served fries in little shopping carts which we may or may not have stole. They have since discontinued the carts. Coincidence I tell you!

Well, FO is just as popular as day 1 even on a rainy Wednesday. We chatted over our first beer and circled the place looking for any hints that anyone was leaving. There’s a simple strategy. Avoid the TVs. If there is a game on, the mens will sit. Forever. Luckily we preyed on a lady and her two man friends paying the bill. Sweet!  Even sweeter if they didn’t hop into a 5 minute impromptu make out session. Jesus lady. Do that at Jack in the Box. I’m hungry.

Note: Btw. ladies, if you’re looking for hot, young men… FO is your wonderground.

Never realized FO had such an extensive menu. Bone marrow! Duck! Pork Belly! WTF! And did yo know that FO has oysters? *dies* Unfortunately by 9PM, they ran out and we went with our 2nd choice, the mussels. Also tossed in duck confit salad, sonoma lamb, and regular fries. Ultimately FO is a bar and they are not going to pace your food especially with the high volume of customers. So everything sorta came out all at once and disturbing fast I might add. Like 2 minutes fast. Freaky.

Maybe it’s my low expectations of bar food but everything was……good. Shockingly good. The duck confit was fall off the bone and just salty enough to cut into the acidity of hte salad. The mussels. OMG. I’m so glad to have delicious mussels so close to home. Fat mussels just barely cooked in yellow curry. Tasty! I started dipping the fries in the curry. Mmmm. The portions are pretty big so by the time we tackled the lamb I was a bit full. The lamb was cooked in a Mediterranean/Greek style on a skewer and it was flavorful. The mint sauce was sorta overpowering but eh.. can’t complain.

4 dishes. 5 beers. 73 buck. Fantastic time with friends.

I really do love LA.

Father’s Office

3229 Helms Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90034
(310) 736-2224
www.fathersoffice.com

AOC. More twists than Shutter Island.

[squid ink risotto via fifi l of yelp.]

me: I’m taking you somewhere nice for your birthday.
him: Does it start with A and end with OC?
me: I hate you.

For our group birthday dinner, AOC was a no brainer. We probably drive by AOC twice a week. Pored over the menu a dozen times yet never stepped foot in. Too pricey? Too ritzy? Too special for a weekday dinner? Whatever the reason, I was happy for an excuse.

Crowd and decor: I always thought that AOC had high ceilings. Very misleading windows. Always assumed that it was dressy. Not quite I must say and compared to other ‘high end’ restaurants, there were quite a few tables with younger children. Interesting. The tables are a bit close together but we had a side booth close to the entrance. Can’t really tell if it’s a good thing or a bad thing. Good because the other tables looked a bit close together. Bad because it felt detached from the main room.

Service, drinks and bread: We started off with bread and spicy tapanade (tomato chili paste?) and some iced tea and wine. I ordered a flight of sparkling wine cuz I love the bubbly. Strangely enough, the wine flight was brought out all at once with stickers numbering 1, 2 and 3. Odd. Maybe I expected the flight to be like Joe’s where he gave them to me during my meal and kindly paired it. Having so many glasses on the table made me feel forced to drink faster to clear space (it was a small table). Service was a bit odd. Our waitress showed up sparingly but the bus boys really cleaned up her act. Bread was refilled many, many times and plates were cleared quickly.

Which brings me to another point. At Tasca, I’m used to the waiters pacing our food. Maybe two items would come at once but usually its pretty well sequenced. At AOC, we got our meat plate and asparagus first. Then 15 minutes later received our fish, chicken, squid ink risotto, and duck all together. Before long, our steak, beef cheeks, and potatos came. All at once. We had a table full of plates. Did I mention it was a small table?

Not only did we have to eat fast to maximize space, we also didn’t want anything to get cold.

Read More

Sacrificing taste for pretty people.

Saturday brunch makes me feel mature.

After having a nice girly mani/pedi morning, the girls decided to meet their mens for a late brunch at La Grande Orange in Santa Monica. How suburban. Service was pretty fantastic considering we all arrived at different times and didn’t put in our order until the last person arrived. Given the crowd that was growing by minutes, our waitress was patient. The table ordered 2 pitchers of sangria (white and red) and the red was far superior. The white tasted like concentrated grape juice (before you mix with water). Meh.

I ordered the hash brown benedict with bacon. Basically its two poached eggs on top of two pieces of honey bacon on top of some potato hash. Lack of flavor. Lacked salt. Could have been from Denny’s. Some people ordered the burger + fries but had to put salt on the burger also. Fries were good. Also had a nibble of the brussels sprouts salad which was pretty tasty. Their ribeye steak was horrible. Not a hint of pink in sight even though we ordered it medium rare. Gross.

In short, the food was awfully mediocre and bland but I do love the open space, the crowd (young and pretty), the location and the red sangria. A-OK. Although I would not be coming back unless invited, I would see how this would be a great place to grab a casual brunch with work folks or casual friends. And besides…… the food was fairly reasonably priced (hash brown benedict was $8) albeit flavorless..

Just avoid the 18 dollar ribeye (steak + eggs).

La Grande Orange

(310) 396-9145

30% off Sushi Mondays @ Yabu

I’ve been excited all week because I thought Yabu changed locations. Thought they moved down the street from their little hole in the wall on Pico and I was dying to check out the new digs.. Turns out all they did was add a huge banner and a bigger nameplate :-/ Ha! Tricked me.

Well played Yabu, well played.

As much as I enjoy ramen and pho, there’s days when I just want something cold. Warm day + Refreshing soba washed down by iced green tea. Perfectly firm noodles dipped in soy, green onions, and wasabi. Heaven! Paired with light, fluffy shrimp/veggie tempura and chicken karaage. My favorite lunch meal in West LA. For those fat days when anything else just seems so heavy. Strive to be “less of a whale, more of woman” as my mother always says.

One gripe I do have is their lunch specials. It’s not really a “special” when it’s 12 dollars.

Yabu

11820 W Pico Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90064
(310) 473-9757

Seriously?

[The Pork Osso Buco *cough* via yelp]

I must preface. Service was 5 stars all the way. Both our waitresses were excellent. Given that we only had 45 minutes to eat before the John Legend concert, they knew when to bring our bill, pace our food, and get us through the side door directly to the theatre.

And the bread was amazingly good. The decor was beautiful.

And that’s where it stops. I’m not being judgmental or bougie but this line from a review I read says a lot… “Quite honestly, this place is one of the best in the valley.”

Oh really. Mighty bold statement for a city that also boasts a 2 story Sizzler’s. :-/

The chef seems like he watched too many episodes of Top Chef and decided that more is well… more. Adding many sauces and stacking your food does not equal fine dining.

We ordered:

Calamari - It’s a staple right? They topped it with mayo, over crusted the already dry calamari and ‘artfully’ arranged it on a bed of marinara sauce. Then sprinkled a handful of herbs on it. Hmmmm.

Ceviche - Oh. I didn’t realize ceviche stood for ‘trio of crudo’. We have some tortilla chips in one corner, a couple marinated whole shrimp in the next, salmon topped with dill mayo in the other, and lastly, ahi tuna chunks? in teriyaki? Is this a twisted version of ahi poke? The best thing on the ‘plate’ was the shrimp and even that was stretching it. You can tell old shrimp from the limp shell..

Mussels in white wine - Huge portion of undersized, overcooked mussels in ….. marinara sauce? Oh.

Fries - French fries were normal. Thanks.

OK. So maybe I won’t ever come back here again. Or to Indio for that matter but seriously? This is not a 4.5 star place. This isn’t even a 3 star place. I applaud the chef’s efforts for a creative menu but creativity does not sacrifice taste.

Tattoo that.

POM Restaurant @ Fantasy Springs Resort
84245 Indio Springs Dr
Indio, CA 92203
(760) 345-2450
www.fantasyspringsresort.com

The other Zo. Less famous. Unrelated. Still good.

He said, “Let’s go to Sushi Zo”

I balked at the idea of going to Sushi Zo. It’s gonna be at least $150/pp  and it’s only the first day of our Valentine’s weekend. It’s a Friday. We don’t just go to Sushi Zo on a whim. I didn’t even throw up today. And not to mention, I’m thrifty. And by thrifty I mean, why don’t we save this money for my Chanel habit.

………and wouldn’t you know Sushi Zo turned us away due to no reservations. Thank you God for loving quilted lambskin purses as much as I do.

However we now have an intense craving for sushi so we headed for the other Zo in the area. K-Zo that is.

Tucked in the corner of DT Culver City and next to Trader Joe’s, K-Zo is a wee little gem. Sure the tables are a bit close together but the decor is very stylish, minimal, can be romantic and aesthetically pleasing.

We ordered a little bit from each section of the menu (sushi, cold plates, hot plates, sashimi platter, etc):

Monkfish Liver - it’s called the ‘foie gras’ of the sea and rightfully so! So smooth and creamy. Tasted so good with the seaweed salad and ponzu.
Live Scallop 2 Ways - Scallop sashimi and scallop sauteed with mushrooms. The sashimi was really good - crisp with a kick. Large portion. We had 4-5 pieces each. Served in the scallop shell. Very cute presentation.
Hamachi Verde - Do not want. Meh. Perfect large pieces of yellowtail sitting in some weird green sauce. The menu said ‘sweet herb sauce’ but this was like aji sauce from Peruvian restaurants. Gross.
Braised Kurabota Pork - so tender. so good! came with half an egg and boiled potato. If it had bones, it’d fall right off them.
Premium Toro Sashimi - Fish butter. Fish cream. Fish *insert other creamy buttery food* Cream overload. Seriously. How can fish be so… soft and buttery?
Nigiri (Yellowtail, Mackerel, King Mackerel, Salmon, Abalone, Sweet Shrimp with fried shrimp heads, Kanpachi) - Everything tasted fresh. The rice to fish ratio was perfect and well portioned. Enjoyed all except for the abalone. Way too tough. And I love shrimp heads. I wish I could just have a bag of shrimp heads in my purse at all times. My superhero alias would be the head muncher.

*awkward silence*

ANYWAY. Hey, guess how much the bill was?

No really. Guess. We both threw out a price.. price is right style. I called 140. He called 215.

And I won!! Only $150!!!!! Mwahahahahaha.

What a great neighborhood sushi place that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg. Now on to Chanel we go.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

K-Zo

9240 Culver Blvd
Culver City, CA 90232
(310) 202-8890

Until next time, Fraiche.

[pic credit: yelp]

Lunch in SanMo has to be some level of personal hell. The traffic. The parking. The sloooooow service. The ladies who walk their dogs at 2pm. The leisurely pace they eat their lunch…no rushing back to the office. Who’s your sugar daddy and can I get some of that?

Located where Riva used to be off 2nd and Wilshire, Fraiche’s menu is focused on rustic french and italian dishes with seasonal ingredients. The decor is still pretty much the same. It’s private, romantic, lots of candles and wide windows.

For the app we decided to share the foie gras terrine. I did something entirely out of character and went with the pork belly salad as my main and he got the burger. The terrine came in two nice size pieces with a fig puree and orange gelee. Very tasty when you eat it all together. Smooth.

The pork belly salad is literally two big slabs of what looks like mutant bacon over wild arugula and frisee. It was crunchy, tender, full of flavor not to mention thick. Unfortunately, I don’t like salads so I just ended up eating both slabs of meat and gorging on Eli’s fries and bread.

His burger was pretty tasty. He complained later that it was too flavorful. How can anything be too flavorful?! Picky.

With the 40% off coupon that the bf graciously sent us, our total came out around 31 bucks before tip. Such a steal.

Now I’m just waiting for some rich dude to snatch me up so I can shop and eat here at regular price. Every day.

Fraiche

312 Wilshire Blvd

Santa Monica, CA 90401

(310) 451-7482

www.fraicherestaurantsm.com

Meet Meat.

I haven’t been to a self serve kbbq place in a long time…. ever since I discovered Road to Seoul it was over. I hate having to get up and get my own meats and stuff. No. These boots are not made for walking.

Things you should be aware of:

1. This is not K Town. This is the outskirts of Hollywood. I think it’s beyond the Santa Monica/La Brea tranny convention but its not K Town.

2. Parking is a bitch. Choeng Wun Korean BBQ is located in a strip mall with a liquor store, a water refill company, and tons of other crap. 67% of the spots are 10 minutes only. FML. Don’t even think about street parking. None.

3. 100% self serve. From getting your utensils to getting your own water. The meat selection is good - tripe, innards, marinated ribs, brisket, pork belly, the usual. They have a good banchan section, a sauce station, rice, veggie area. I was starving so I filled up on fried rice. Rookie mistake. :(

4. Ignore the B rating. I know it’s sorta unnerving when you’re piling up plates and plates of raw meat. If you’re that worried, just make sure you don’t undercook your meats. The grill is sorta janky but hella strong. Twice I thought it was going to burn my face off.

5. It’s really good. The marinated ribs and bulgogi was amazing. Mmmm. All you can eat bbq is like the devil’s meal for lunch. I’m sure it was 10 times over my calorie intake.

All in all, given that its the same price (actually I think its the same - 16 bucks AYCE) as Road to Seoul, I’ll definitely choose the other place. The food is good here but I’d only come back if someone else drove me. You know how I panic over parking :(

Choeng Wun Korean BBQ

944 N Western Ave
Los Angeles, CA 90029

(323) 465-7590

Bouchon <3

[Mmm. FO soup pic from Lien P]

Sorry Thomas Keller. I have to say it. Bouchon Beverly Hills has a lot of aging hookers (funny. i was talking to my boss and he thought i said ASIAN hookers. Nope. Aging.) I mean, it’s not TK’s fault or anything. I just didn’t know hookers were so up on game. Here’s a how to guide on blowjobs, watch out for cops and here’s a Michelin guide. Say whatttt?

Bouchon LA is definitely great for older people watching. Prostitutes aside, the crowd is the creme de la creme of upper BH. Old money. With that said, the best game to play here is, “Whose cheating on their wives? Whose on prescription meds?” Answer: All.

Came here two weeks ago maybe a little bit after it opened. Hopefully reservations are a little more lax by now. We had to settle for a 9PM ressie for a weekday AND didn’t get seated till 9:30. Ouch.

We started with the French onion soup, salmon rilette, and escargot. He didn’t like the soup too much. I thought it was good. It’s a bit lighter than other places, it’s not as thick yet very flavorful. Probably the best french onion soup I’ve ever had. Other places load it up so much, it’s like eating thick soggy bread. Ew. The escargot was the special of the night and it was delicious! Perfectly cooked with garlic and herbs topped with puff pastry.. added a nice texture/element to your otherwise normal escargot dish.

The salmon rillette was cute. It came in a glass jar that they open for you. It was so fresh and a bit fatty/greasy but tasty. It was way too much between two people…I could have went through five of those bread plates. :(

For our mains, he got the steak frites and I got the roasted chicken. I think both were average. The steak was cooked perfectly but lacked any special flavor. The fries were OK considering people rave about them. My chicken was good. The skin was crispy and meat was moist. Sitting on top of shallots and fingerling potatos, I couldn’t help but find the flavors a bit underwhelming. Ended with creme brulee which was sorta average also.

Service was impeccable and for all the food we got the bill was a bit under 180 tax and tip included. Not bad. Saves us a drive to Napa :D

Bouchon

235 N Canon Dr

Beverly Hills, CA 90210

(310) 271-9910

www.bouchonbistro.com

I finally learned that mussels are easy to make.

Made a seafood-centric dinner on Sunday and had enough for leftovers tonight. Mmmmm. Truthfully, seafood looks way more impressive than it really is. All it takes is careful watching and timing. You can put together a 4 course dinner in less than 30 minutes. Yes, you want to date me. I know.

Note: All seafood was purchased from Santa Monica Seafood on 10th and Wilshire. 2lbs of mussels, 12 oysters (kumamoto, hama hama, malpeque), 4 jumbo scallops, a shucker, cocktail sauce = under 50 bucks. Such a great deal and super helpful and fresh. The guy that worked there was super nice! He took time to teach me how to shuck oysters :D (it’s hard! and dangerous!)

I’m only putting up the recipes for the mussels and scallop recipes cuz even retards know how to make garlic fries.

Sunday menu: Fresh oysters, scallops with tarragon butter, mussels with saffron cream, and garlic fries.

Mussels with Saffron Cream (adapted from epicurious)

• 1 large onion, halved lengthwise
• Rounded 1/4 teaspoon crumbled saffron threads
• 3/4 teaspoon salt
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 cup dry white wine
• 1/2 cup heavy cream
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 2 lb cultivated mussels, rinsed well
• 2 tablespoons chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley
• 1 tbs of garlic, minced

Cut onion halves crosswise into less than 1/16-inch-thick slices with slicer.

Cook onion and garlic with saffron and 1/2 teaspoon salt in oil in a wide 6- to 8-quart heavy pot over moderately high heat, covered, stirring occasionally, until onion is softened, about 5 minutes.

Add wine and bring to a boil, then stir in cream, pepper, remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt, and mussels. Cook, covered, checking after 4 minutes and transferring opened mussels to soup bowls with a slotted spoon. (Discard any that remain unopened after 8 minutes.)

Stir parsley into broth and pour over mussels.

Seared scallops with tarragon butter (adapted from gourmet)

• 4-6 large sea scallops, tough ligament from side of each discarded
• 7 tablespoons unsalted butter, cut into tablespoons, divided
• 2 tablespoons finely chopped shallot
• 1/4 cup dry white wine
• 1/4 cup white-wine vinegar
• 1 tablespoon finely chopped tarragon

Pat scallops dry and sprinkle with 1/4 teaspoon each of salt and pepper (total).

Heat 1 tablespoon butter in a 12-inch nonstick skillet over medium-high heat until foam subsides, then sear scallops, turning once, until golden brown and just cooked through, about 5 minutes total. Transfer to a platter.

Add shallot, wine, and vinegar to skillet and boil, scraping up brown bits, until reduced to 2 tablespoons. Add juices from platter and if necessary boil until liquid is reduced to about 1/4 cup. Reduce heat to low and add 3 tablespoons butter, stirring until almost melted, then add remaining 3 tablespoons butter and swirl until incorporated and sauce has a creamy consistency. Stir in tarragon and salt to taste; pour sauce over scallops.

Enjoy!

These pictures are just the beginning. Food binging!

My mom used to think I had worms cuz I can eat like a champ. Unfortunately it was just because I was young and had a extremely high metabolism. As I get older and wiser, I can no longer murder at buffets. I eat lean cuisines and count my ‘points’. Gross I know. Right next to my Yelp and Urbanspoon app is ‘Lose it!’ - a convenient weight loss for a modern you’ app. Ouch.

But come on. It’s the holidays. I should take this opportunity to seize my youth back! MY GLORY DAYS! And I know the perfect place to do it: The Universal Hilton Buffet. What? You never heard of it? Well, let me feed you baby birds.

This buffet has everything you ever dreamed of. Unless you have freaky dreams, then that’s just creepy.

You have:

Lobster, prime rib, leg of lamb, shark fin soup, abalone, Peking duck, honey walnut shrimp, crispy calamari, ginger crab, escargot, curry mussels, a dedicated ‘cold’ seafood station with oysters, crab legs, shrimp cocktail and more. A sashimi and sushi station. A TACO TRUCK STATION with fish, beef, chicken tacos. A handroll chef just standing there ready to make you a delicious handroll. No way you say. YES way.

And there’s more.

There is a pasta station with pasta made to order. There’s two rows of salad - octopus salad, lox, jelly fish, regular salad. You name it. And dessert fiends? They have A CHOCOLATE FOUNTAIN. Creme Brulee, cotton candy, Haagen Daaz ice cream, bread pudding.

It’s the best 48 dollars you will ever spend. Ever. Yes I ate my money’s worth and yes I’ll do it again god dammit.

Ok maybe after I fast for two months or as I’d like to refer to a hunger strike for the blind children.

Cafe Sierra @ the Hilton

555 Universal Terrace Parkway
Universal City, CA 91608

(818) 509-2030

It could have been epic.

Unfortunately eating live octopus loses its novelty in 10 seconds flat. I’m not a tiger. I don’t like to play with my food before I eat it. I like it dead. Don’t let the video fool you. Once you poke those lil suckers (no pun intended), it fights for dear life. It clings onto the plate in despair and sucks onto your tongue, roof of your mouth, teeth.. .anything it can cling on to avoid the inevitable.

Fortunately you are the human. and you are in charge. You bite and chew until there’s no more life and then you swallow him into the dark abyss of your stomach.

Repeat.

Bored.

Fortunately this trip wasn’t an entire fluke as I finally got to taste fresh uni! I LOVE UNI! UNI UNI UNI!! OMGZOMG! Despite its horrendous spiky shell, there lies its sweet sweet essence. Oh I love you uni.

Yea. That about sums it up.

Btw. Masan is open till 2AM. Not that you’d wanna be battling octopus when you’re high or drunk. Or worse. SHROOMS.

Yikes.

Masan

2851 W Olympic Blvd.
Los Angeles, CA 90006
(213) 388-3314

Charm me: Ludobites @ Royal/T.

[all pics courtesy of Eli G. - friend, lunch buddy and fellow diner at ludobites]

My expectations of Ludobites probably skewed my judgment. When I hear Ludobites I think of creative, clever, well executed, and charming.

Ludo may be all of those things himself (super nice guy) but his food fell short of my high expectations. Some chefs focus on seasonal, simple food with complex flavors. Some gear toward Bazaar like creativity. This was neither. In fact, if anything I felt the menu that lacked theme and consistency on both regards. This is SO not the food I expected from the glowing reviews, the highly acclaimed breadbar showing and Ludo Lefebvre in general. Quit lying to me yelp.

After we confused ourselves silly with the menu, we decided to just get two of everything (minus the peanuts and desserts). It was perfect for 6 people. The dishes were quite proportional for three to share.

Food breakdown (some i don’t have pics for):

Scallops with brown butter, pineapple and black powder - I love raw scallops and this was no exception. Fresh though nothing special. The pineapple was honestly the best part.

Fish Ceviche - Fish to onion ratio was way way off. Between three people we all had a little bit of fish with a huge amount of veggie left over. But it was way too acidic.

Monterrey squid with chorizo oil, kimchi puree, and grilled sweet jalepenos - Squid was cooked perfectly. Love the chorizo oil. The kimchi puree didn’t stand out.

Bread soup with poached egg and gruyere marshmallow - this was like high end biscuits and gravy minus the biscuits. Tasty. I’m glad we shared this because eating a whole bowl of soup with gravy like consistency is like a heart attack. The poached egg was a nice touch.

Read More