It’s not my fault you don’t have rose colored glasses.
So remember creepy guy from Ralph’s that I gave my number to?
Well. He ended up calling me at work and I had to totally put my foot down and tell him to get lost [well. I left him a scorching voicemail ala “Umm. Can you please stop calling me? It’s creepy”]. I hope he gets the hint.
Which brings me to a frustrating point: what guys fail to understand is that sometimes girls are just being nice . Seriously. Haha. I tried to explain this to my friend yesterday but my point got completely lost.
I’m a really open person. Very oblivious at times. When people strike up a conversation with me in the grocery store, gas station, bar, etc, I just assume they are bored and making small talk and that’s that. I don’t feel like “oh he must be trying to hit on me” or “Oh man. I’m so hot. Of course he’s hitting on me” I just assume they are asking me a question just like I would if I needed to figure out what kind of wine to cook with. I mean, jeez. I have 15 minutes conversations with old ladies in the tampon aisle discussing the best needs for her vadge. I don’t give men special precedence. When I say, people talk to me a lot, it’s not coming off as conceited I really mean… People in GENERAL talk to me a lot [not men]. I used to work in retail what can I say? I am just really prone to great customer service.
As self aware as I am about how I operate, it’s really hard to wrap my head around how the WORLD works. I don’t have walls or precautions when it comes to people. I am not wary of men. I’m not wary of women. In fact, I don’t even really separate men and women. The world just IS to me. People like me. I like them back.
My ex always used to tell me my biggest weakness was that I trust everyone. I really do. I guess that’s why I get in cars with strangers, give out my number, follow people to the edge without a second thought – because deep down, I really feel like ‘why would anyone hurt me intentionally? I’m me.’
It really upsets me when people don’t understand why I think this way or say that I’m just playing naïve and that I should know better by now. It IS kind of stupid because I don’t learn from experiences. I don’t screen my prospects better than I did in high school. I don’t see the red flags. Because it just doesn’t click. I don’t carry that baggage from each weirdo to another.
Clean slate. It always has been. Always will.
Instinctually, I guess being “aware” has not become a second nature yet. Not even sure I really want it to. Seems defeating to live life overanalyzing everyone you meet. What if they really just wanted to know where the shallots are jeez?!
It’s not that I’m naïve. I’m just not jaded.
