Love Life, Hate Kittens

OK. So I finally had my ‘Fitness’ test done today. It’s basically an evaluation to see what your goals are, where you’re at, blah blah. So, my trainer who is the nicest guy ever asked me what my goals are. Here is the most fml convo ever.

T: What are your fitness goals?

Me: Ummm. To look really good. I mean. I know I am perfectly fine now. But I want to look even better. Tone arms. Flat abs.

T: OK. What would you benefit from that?

Me: (what kinda question is this?) Um. I look better? Like you see me? This is where me is. and this is where the potential is. *does weird hand motions* I know I can maximize me.

T: Once again. But what do you REALLY want to do?

Me: (ok. this must be a riddle.) Hmm. (sidenote: if you know me then you know this is the moment, I fold under pressure. So I said….)

Me: Oh ummm. One of my life goals is to run the marathons.

T: OH COOL! Now we’re getting somewhere. Which one?

Me: Oh.. (there are different ones?!) Umm. You know. LA, NY, etc.’

T: That’s great. Is there a reason for this?

Me: (Yes. Cuz you pressured me into lying) Yes. To save… umm. disabled children.

FML.